THE FOOTBALL PHONE-IN

is like confession
it is an intensely religious experience
i've been listening to the football phone-in
for various reasons
1. because i have a disastrous life
2. because i am a fantasy football manager
3. because i am a bad fantasy football manager
and the football phone-in is very interesting
when a caller begins they make a statement of confession
to the presenter who we can call the priest
forgive me father we've been terrible at defending
forgive me father we've got no passion
forgive me father we've lost our way
then the conversation goes on to bring about an understanding
to justify the belief
the ridiculous belief in football
which follows the ancient precept of belief
the less you have the more you believe
the more you believe the less you have
tonight has been like listening to the killers of Christ
for a few weeks people have been calling up demanding the death of a manager
manager Mark Hughes of Manchester City
tonight he was killed
the Arabs crucified Mark Hughes
and now in confession the callers have been pleading for his resurrection
and their forgiveness
because in his death they feel their guilt

YOU ARE NOT REALLY HERE

which is the essence of life
the point of existence is not to exist
because to exist is to suffer the incurable malady of non-existence
we exist not to exist

MY NEW FRIEND

CAN ANYONE EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?

right so there's a meeting in Copenhagen
every country in the world is there including Australia
the thing about the meeting is it's meant to save the world
which it won't
but regardless of this
the point of the meeting is to save the world
so why are they saying today that they are running out of time?
that they are going to run out of time to decide to save the planet
that tomorrow is the last day they have to decide to save the planet
how about extending the meeting by an hour?
or two
or a day?
what's the problem? is the meeting room booked?
is someone having a wedding? are the jehovahs coming to town?
i think this might be the strangest thing i've ever heard
is this truly what they are going to write in the book of the world
tried saving the world, ran out of time
politics is ludicrous
it cannot achieve anything
......
snowed today
snow tomorrow
what you need:

ABUSE

public space is not
a kitchen
a living room
a bedroom
a dining room
a car
but public space is
a kitchen
a living room
a bedroom
a dining room
a car
there is no public space
on the bus
on the train
on the pavement
on a bench
in the park
i am constantly abused
i must listen to music i don't want to listen to
i must smell food i don't want to smell
or eat
i must listen to private conversations i don't want to listen to
one half of private conversations
which then forces me to pretend to be the other half in my head
which i do not want to be
or do
every day
from 8 in the morning
till 7 in the evening
it is constant
it is a form of madness
......
why are people so rude at work?
people in the office i'm in swear a lot
they swear when their computer beeps
they swear when they receive an email
they swear when they send an email
they swear when they put a telephone down
they swear when they stand up
they swear when they sit down
the correct response to a beeping computer is something like
hehehe a beeping computer
under the surface everyone's very unhappy
......
i saw my insides today
nothing's wrong
which makes me feel strange
if nothing's wrong why does it sometimes feel wrong?
how can that be?
my heart looks like Fernando Pessoa

I WILL KILL MYSELF IF YOU VOTE FOR DAVID CAMERON

LILAC BUSH